Aita for not paying for my daughters wedding dress. Oct 11, 2023 · The Wedding Dress Dilemma.
Aita for not paying for my daughters wedding dress. And both of them wanted me to walk them down the aisle. She also asked me to pay for half of her wedding dress, which costs $10,000. And now she's losing the family wedding dress. Your cousin is being a maid-of-honor-zilla and you don’t need that. Yeah, it's definitely because it didn't cover deposit refunds, which is the precise thing OP's daughter would have needed. I (24f) am engaged to my fiance, "Adrien"(25m). Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. My daughter is getting married in spring next year. While I agree that amount is ridiculous and you are in the right for no longer paying for the wedding/honey moon, you 1. My husband found out and told Leah. AITA for paying for my son's honeymoon and wedding? my younger son Charlie has a 15 yo daughter Kaia from a previous relationship. But we're very respectful towards each other. Thank You for mentioning her, I can't with the amount of Reels I've watched on Instagram with the "I used My great grandmother wedding dress for my wedding" title and is just a basic beach that took a beautiful historical dess and altered it to look like the crap that Shein or Wish send for 40 dollars. I thought she already knew since a lot of people hated her wedding. AITA For demanding my fiancé and his mom to pay for a new wedding address? Not the A-hole. My stepdad raised me like a biological child and would have %100 solved this by paying for neither of our college tuition. Tuesday Olivia asked me to go with her to pay some vendors, one of the stops was the tailor shop for a final fitting and pay the seamstress. ”. Adorable-Crew-Cut-92. You spent $65k on 1 daughter, and $35k on the other. I took her with me and my mom and friends. 8K comments. I met John in December 2021 and we got engaged around two Edit: corrected a word cuz my phone does me dirty That is because he knows he is the father, or at least strongly suspects it. He is a jerk who cheats on her and treats her poorly, but she is too blind to see it. When it comes to weddings, emotions can run high and expectations can often clash. If there’s enough fabric, you could do this & maybe give to your sons. I (47M) met my wife (49F) when we were in our mid twenties. This led to a heated debate within the family and left I gave FMIL 3 days to pay me for a new wedding dress or else I the family a photo of her wearing it. I spoke to my daughter and I told her about my love for my dress and the memories it brought me. Tell her anything above that is on her and her fiance. My sister has refused and said that it was "our responsibility" because my daughter wore an expensive dress despite being warned not to. It's probably not too late to recoup some of your 200k too. 2. Second prom cost about $200 (my date paid for the limo. 3 - you let her dad help you pay for the dress and don't tell her that - any financial agreement between you and Nicholas is between you and Nicholas. I told her that it was not my responsibility to pay for her dress, and that she should either buy a cheaper one or ask our parents for money. I have Vivian with my fiancé 32m who will call John. She can’t afford a dress in that sense so I would be helping her if I let her use mine. I might be the ah for demanfing that she pay me for a new dress just because she wore this dress once. I have been in our daughters' (26F) life for 22 years. Ask them to ask money from her biological dad. " My wife made her wedding dress with her mother. Its very sentimental to her and she was very proud of it. Also statistics show that people who spend a lot on weddings are more likely to divorce. If I didn't feel so strongly about the dress I would give it to her simply to spite them. If anything, that should be a conversation between the sisters and you, as the MOTHER, should stay out of it. Tessa was mortified to the point of tears and Leah reacted by calling her a “stupid little whore” and telling her to get out of her life forever. My girlfriend is also coming with us and I'm paying for her and her 5 y/o daughter. My second dress was free (my cousin gave it to me. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote You have to treat children equally, regardless of their choices. Nta, especially with the sentimental value from your mum. When she last came to visit, she brought up altering my wedding dress and wearing it. I found it ripped apart by my daughter’s dogs. Agree. My nephew's fiance is getting her wedding dress from a pawn shop and I have no idea My (34F) daughter (12F) has been acting uncooperative in the context of the planning process for my wedding. While he didn’t It is irrational, unnecessary, and only going to cause problems between you and your daughter if you don't get over it. It's true, I don't "own" her, I also don't owe her a fully-funded wedding. Depending on the manufacturer and the quality of gown, a shop may need anywhere from 4 weeks to 3-4 months lead time to receive an order. I think, I need to give a background information before explaining the details. 1 update - Medium. Plus All Updates. I refused and asked her to ask her "real Dad" (who refused to pay for it himself). If she wants a blow out wedding, she can pay for it. I thought the dress was somewhat creepy and ADMIN MOD. Why does it bother you that she waited till 30 to get married. That dress cost a couple of hundred I’ve seen people make tree skirts (if you’re someone who puts up Christmas trees). Me 26F and my fiancé 28M been engaged for 4 months, we're planning on having our wedding on October 18th, My future mother in law kept annoying me and sending me suggestions for choosing the right wedding dress, and said that she knew better Aug 19, 2022 · In the post titled "AITA for cutting off support to my daughter?" the 52-year-old man said he has three children with his ex-wife Tracy: Michael, 28, Linda, 25, and Victoria, 23. **Judgement - NTA**. But I truly hope he keeps the current one, because she is simply the best. Hello everyone, I post my previous post on r/AmITheAsshole but the moderators didn't allow this update so I'm posting it on this subreddit. 9K votes, 5. Help keep the sub engaging! Establish the amount of $$ you are willing to provide and give her the budget. He can’t blow his plausible deniability by taking a paternity test. It started as an argument with her mother about how her daughter is a princess and I said no her daughter works a Chili’s and doesn’t even have a high school education while my son has been taking classes Yes, I get it, is her wedding and she can be mean to whoever she wants or rude, but she also should not expect support from the one guy she is doing it to. I was pregnant. Maxim Fesenko/Getty. Our parents are paying 30% Stella and Jon paying for the rest themselves. She told me she can just up the size of it and I told her I would think A few months ago Olivia asked my wife if she could use the dress for her wedding and my wife gave her the dress so Olivia could get it fitted with plenty of time. 18 hours ago · AITA for not allowing my daughter to significantly alter my wedding dress. I don't want to come across as controlling or manipulative. I hope you have an excellent wedding with a maid of honor that honors YOUR CHOICE of dress without jerking your around and trying to control you. One man explained to the internet that when his sister got engaged last year, she asked his 17-year-old son to make The issue was that my daughter's wedding was happening in another state that is a 13 hour drive away. I have gotten direct messages telling me that I am right not to give my daughter the dress because they are homophobic and think she should not be getting married. Having a first dance is not a wedding. I spoke to my friend who worked on the dress during Becca's wedding. Family doesn't mean anything but acknowledgement. Oct 11, 2023 · The Wedding Dress Dilemma. That's the problem. Sep 14, 2023 · PravinI123 agreed, stating "maybe [you're] doing your daughter a favor by not attending her wedding. A and L have been muddled up along the way! Since you did not put in any money towards the dress, you are not entitled to make a decision in it. MOD. After the woman left, my SIL and I cracked up. AITA for refusing to pay for my daughter's wedding? Not the A-hole. The drunk driver took away Lena, but YOU, the person she loves and trusts, are taking away the dress. We have 3 daughters (34, 30, 25) and 1 son (28). Her getting a 10k dress defeats my whole purpose of paying for the wedding because I didn’t want my son to be in a boat load of debt. first prom cost about $120. The dress was $12,000 which I know because I was there and if she damaged it at all o was concerned about how was going to pay. It is also important to note that it was paid for completely by my mother and I, and in fact, my MIL did not pay for anything in our wedding, except for $200 towards our honeymoon, which I thanked her profusely for. How LOVELY. You agreed to keep it for her wedding, did you say at the time only if you marry someone of the opposite gender no. From Maria's POV, you're taking a terrible situation filled with loss and grief, and twisting the knife- making her lose even more. OOP: I am not homophobic. lalapocalypse. This is my (38m) first post here so I’ll try to make it coherent. com. We're not very close and distance is one of the reasons why. Your daughter had a reasonable expectation, you had agreed to keep the 20k for her wedding. It is hers! You want to invite someone to a wedding then go renew your own vows. youtube. AITA? 5. You don't have an obligation to invite your friends to your daughters wedding. AITA for telling my daughter she should change her wedding dress to green? Not the A-hole. My wife made it known that the dress was not to be altered except to be taken in/let out so it could be kept and reworn. Georgia burst into tears and to be fair my sister did bring her a change of clothes. Feb 28, 2023 · And a recent post on the AITA subreddit just might take the dress drama cake. It turns out Emily's way over budget, and the main culprit is the dress. This is so painful, I hope it's fake. I said that if the dress was permanently ruined, I wanted my sister to reimburse us. She places a lot of emphasis on her upcoming wedding. My brother, who is getting married in 2024, can't get insurance for less than £300 per year and what's covered is greatly reduced. She's 23. We've always been super close, so I'm thrilled for her, but honestly, the whole wedding planning thing has been a bit much. I refused to give my wedding dress to my daughter. But in addition to that he basically took away her cell phone for a period of six months, mandatory therapy, the mother in addition to that also suggested that they take the door Aug 5, 2022 · #aita #wedding #familyBACKGROUND MUSIC From Youtube Audio Library: Book Bag - E's Jammy Jams https://www. We were told this is going to be a casual outdoor wedding at the park. Final update: AITA for not paying for my step daughter wedding. The oldest daughter is straight-laced and is doing the whole get married and have a traditional life. Jul 15, 2022 · A daughter is being lambasted online for destroying her mother's heirloom wedding dress to make her own. AD: Generation Tux for all your suit needs!Two other episodes like this one:Wedded Bliss on a Budget:Essential Tools & Tips for the Budget-Savvy BrideWedding Dilemmas: Wedding Controversies Unpacked in Reddit's AITA?Want to ask Jamie your wedding pla Seems they are both not wanting to tie the knot. AITA for not wearing the wedding dress my stepsister handmade for me? Not the A-hole POO Mode. com/watch?v=ECD-IS2uSGMStory 1:AITA not payi YTA, and you're homophobic. true. As I was reading through the comments the punishment for simple she would have to pay 12,000 for the wedding dress that she damaged, $3,000 4 the emotional distress. 6 days ago · My daughter asked what she meant by that and I was honest with her. I was upset and it made me feel better to see people agree with me. My son's first girlfriend (and the only other partner he had before this one) is an absolute sweetheart as well. If A has given the dress back, it goes to L because L BOUGHT it. “OP I honestly wonder if the dress your daughter bought is her dream dress. I have always dreamed of walking her down the aisle (my husband passed when she was a child) and she enjoyed talking about a future wedding and playing bride when she was a child Lumpy-Will406. I would bet this “daughter” is trans/non binary (hence conflicting views on their “identity”). And I get it, daughter more than likely has legit reasons to not like his wife, but you still don’t give a middle finger to the person paying for it. I was shocked and refused. but she picked a dress that she liked so much and said that "she always pictured her son's bride in it" mom and friends thought this line was creepy. The anonymous man, known AITA for not letting my step daughter wear a dress to my wedding. When I went to prom (and I went twice, sophomore year and senior year), my first dress was 60 (loved that dress). One aquaintence who saw it scolded her for selling it, and told how beaautiful she looked wearing it. 1 - you pay for a different dress. As the big day approached, tensions arose when I made the decision not to pay for her wedding dress. “I have a feeling that she can’t afford to pay for her dream dress, and you paying for another I am not the OOP. We were talking about wedding dresses and she suddenly brought up Lauren's wedding dress. UPDATE: For all the YTA people out there, I've decided to give my daughter a gift in the same amount as her older sister's wedding cost. YTA ThrowRA-Scam200K. That would be a lot more meaningful and long lasting. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: buying my daughter a $700 prom dress when mine and my husbands budget was $400. This caused an arguement and she called me a jerk by the end. For the NTA people out there, thanks, most of you get it. I was so lucky to have found what I was looking for. when he got married to his wife she and Kaia didn't get along so Kaia stopped going to Charlie's home as much and spends most of her time at my older son Derek's home. OOP should have told daughter that 1, she has to pay for the damages because yes, she is responsible for her (dogs) behavior, 2, gotten legal aid if necessary and 3, told daughter to not contact her for a while and that she won't go to the wedding after this. After fsil’s reaction to not getting her way, if I were you I would seriously consider having security (and password all of your vendors) at your wedding in case fsil decides to sabotage (destroy the cake, spill wine on your dress, cancel the caterer), make a grab for attention (wear a wedding/white dress, announce a pregnancy, bring her own officiant to marry her and brother, invite her own My oldest son is paying for himself and his 2 sons (7M, 5M), and I'm paying the costs for everyone else including my 30 y/o's fiancé and my 16 y/o sons’ best friend. My wife says refusing to pay is wrong and that I overreacted even though she's not been nice to me. ADMIN MOD. My youngest is the opposite. But I did not relent and said she's not my business now. I let my mom (70f) know I planned on getting married 2 years before the wedding date. You should be grateful you have the opportunity to yeet your way out of this family before converting from fiancee to husband. A catharsis for the frustrated moral philosopher in all of us, and a place…. She has always said she would love for our kids to wear her dress at their wedding. In this generation she just skipped her starter marriage. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I refused to lend my wedding dress to my daughter. If you can sink 200k on a wedding for your step daughter, you are worth so much more than this BS. She fell in love with this designer gown – we're talking thousands of Its very sentimental to her and she was very proud of it. I'm feeling quite conflicted about this. A wedding is a sacred commitment, including God or not, between two people who want to spend their lives together. Check out this great listen on Audible. Like Jakob isn’t aware of who he’s marrying, I’m sure he knows she isn’t wearing a dress. I support my daughter, I have just been surprised and am struggling. Now my daughter wants to wear the dress and I told her it wouldn’t be a good idea since she won’t be able to squeeze into it. - 7 days later. his mother will be as much her family as you are, might as well embrace it. My sister in law sold her wedding dress at a garage sale. Wearing a wedding dress is not a wedding. She was a single parent. Truthfully OP'd be within their rights to charge for more than the replacement cost here, not less, because unlike a cheese board, more than the item was stolen / destroyed: they could charge for wedding pictures needing to be rescheduled and redone, and the time and cost for same to their bridal party as well; cost of alterations to both dresses; emotional impact; and, oh, y'know, S specified If we had never built up a woman’s being given from one man to another as the be-all end-all of her existence then maybe we wouldn’t be to the point where women attach so much value to a wedding day from girlhood, and therefore not having a specific dress wouldn’t ruin your entire wedding. All of my extended family chose to attend my daughter's wedding over my stepdaughter's. And it's ridiculous that she would expect a 30k wedding to be paid by OP when he offered his other two 5k each. My now-husband (27M) and I paid for most of the wedding, but my father covered a few costs for us. Sure, they had fancier weddings, that's because they worked for it and could afford it. That her wedding wasn’t a good experience for guests and it is a running joke at this point with family/friends. As a response, I told her that if she feels that way, then I won't be paying for her wedding. Step kids (USUALLY) have two living parents who pay out the butt to “share” them. My little sister Emily's getting married in a few months. ThrwayStepSisDress. AITA for not allowing my daughter to significantly alter my wedding dress Not the A-hole So we went to the store, and my best friend tried the dress so that the employees could measure everything they need to fix the dress. The issue started when Zoey visited to talk about her wedding in april. Tell her the truth. Not the A-hole. YTA. Well done, you! I adore my daughter-in-law too. The wedding dress is one of the most important parts of a wedding, and Spinnerofyarn • • 4 mo. So her wedding dress size reflects that. She passed away two years ago so she will can not attend our daughters wedding that will be in 2025. In my opinion, it is not your obligation to pay a cent if you don’t want to. The dress is not important. Make sure to tell her if that includes travel, etc for the bridal couple and family members. She began to protest and said I am affecting her education and that I cannot do that. She doesn't need someone who can't put her first on one of her most important days. My dress was on last-call off the rack clearance at a budget bridal chain and was a simple thing, no beading or anything, and was $350, but because it was off the rack it needed fairly substantial alterations. Bio Daughter’s Dad and I relationship did not end on good terms and while I tried my best to keep the children out of it, he did not agree and in an attempt to get the kids to side with him, he went on a smear campaign against me. I 32f have a step-daughter 14 female who I'll call Vivian. You don't get a say on if your step daughter wants to invite her bio dad to her wedding. His parents are paying about 60% of the wedding. "she's family" are the death knell words. In a post shared to Reddit’s AITA [Am I the A**hole] subreddit, the 49-year-old woman, who posted under the username @67099107, revealed that her daughter Lauren passed away from sepsis at the age of 26, the same month that She insisted to come along for wedding dress shopping. OP's stepdaughter sounds like a real winner of a human being. 4. So, for her to ask if I would lend her my $4500 dream dress that she had no part in buying that I had custom made for myself . AITA for wanting my daughters to wear nice dresses at their cousin's wedding? Asshole. My nephew is getting married in July and my husband, our daughters (19, 15, 4), and I were invited. NTA - it's plain to see OP's youngest initiated contact with her parents to get her wedding paid for. At this age, her daughter will never accept you as a father figure , so you can accept that fact and act accordingly. MIL's eyes literally lit up… She said it was a beautiful dress and that it was similar to what she was searching for her own dress…Hilary thanked MIL and explained to her that it was her I paid £100 flat rate for full coverage back in 2019 for my wedding. Unexpectedly, my daughter sat me down and told me that she will be inviting my brother and his family(he married my cheating ex). She doesn’t work and only collects social security and disability I believe. Concluded as per OOP. Larger sizes and custom orders for shorter or longer lengths take longer to manufacture. I (25F) got married two weeks ago. My father's girlfriend "Stella" has a daughter, "Zoey" (21F), who is finishing her degree in Reply reply. Apparently, she was seeing them for the last 4 years and built a relationship behind my back. I (16f) grew up without a father for a long time it was just me and my mom. Last year my mom got married to my step dad brad. NTA. You have no problems with same sex couples so long as you're not related to them. Mar 25, 2022 · Commenters were quick to support a father who claimed that he refused to pay for his daughter's wedding after she told him he could not bring his husband or their son. I might be risking my relationship with her and my fiance by insisting on having her pay. NTA - that was a sucky thing for her to leverage her money like that. Mar 3, 2024 · "Update: AITA for not allowing my daughter to significantly alter my wedding dress" Comfortable_Love8350. The family is on board because this is going to be a very big wedding. It's HER wedding, HER wedding dress, HER experience. Brad has 2 kids Tessa (f26) and Jake (m18) my dad passed away shortly after I was born leaving my mom in mountains of debt. Forget the wedding, forget flying in family, forget all the reasons you did what you did. If you're happy to be cordial, get the alterations you need done to the dress, deduct the cost from the $900 and pay what's left back. My daughter has also agreed to figure out a way to include us in a way that doesn't involve "giving her away. You are not obliged to pay for her wedding since you are not her dad, even though you tried and supported her. In the uk, you can donate wedding dresses, and they make outfits for baby's that are born sleeping, that what my sister did with hers. I posted recently about my daughter surprising me by wanting to turn my wedding dress into a suit, which I refused despite having promised her because the reality hurt me. Should've paid attention to what your money was being spent on and 2. 2- she lets her dad help you buy the dress - he must owe child support so she'd be taking what she is lawfully and morally due. In the end: You spent $65k on one daughter, and $35k on the other. This is nothing but a farce. She told me that she can alter my dress to fit Anna but there would be lot of changes as Anna is much larger (350 lbs vs my 150 lbs). The OOP is u/Comfortable_Love8530 posting in r/AmItheAsshole. your daughters wedding isn’t about you or your feelings. My daughter said she didn't want to wear a dress like that I was fine with that. Original - 28th February 2024. AITA for telling my stepsister she can't wear my mom's wedding dress. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. She is a product of the system and hasn’t Mar 1, 2023 · AITA for not giving my sister her wedding dress because she didn't invited my underage son? Feb 28, 2024 · "AITA for not allowing my daughter to significantly alter my wedding dress?" My (44f) daughter (25f) is getting married later this year to her girlfriend (27f). I couldn't imagine NOT loving a woman that my son loves and is making part of our family. 16M subscribers in the AmItheAsshole community. Update - 2nd March 2024. You shouldn't pay for the wedding, and your sister needs to have a wedding within her own means and budget. 4K comments. ago. Zoey's younger than Lauren. She can pay for her own wedding if she's insistent on this stance. It was simple but freaking gorgeous. I just managed to luck out and purchase a vintage wedding dress for about $1200 from a lovely older woman who was selling it on Ebay. 1. In our culture both parents are paying for the wedding, 50/50. Some felt that Michaela’s reaction may have stemmed from the fact that the dress she ended up purchasing was not her “dream dress”, as she had said it was. Maria lost her stepsister. 2K votes, 1. I feel like him saying you pay for wedding is his way of not getting married becasue you don't have the funds but when you call his bluff and say hey here use our property and get married op wants this huge wedding that would cost a quite a few thousand dollars to find is her way of not getting married. Mar 17, 2022 · A woman has questioned whether she was wrong to refuse her stepdaughter’s request to wear her late daughter’s wedding gown after it sparked a family-wide argument. It ultimately depends on how much handwork a gown has and how intricate the construction. mentally_messy102518. She can use this for whatever she wants. In case this story gets deleted/removed: AITA for not letting my step daughter wear a dress to my wedding. •. If you want a quick summary here it is: I'm refusing to pay for Any traditional wedding dress at a real bridal shop, even a chain one, is going to be well more than OP's $50-100 budget. ) Includes costs for nails, shoes, minimal makeup. If she alters your dress to fit her, unless you're identical twins with the same body shape, she needs to pay for it to be fitted to you. . Reddit User: u/Comfortable_Love8350#reddit #redditstories #storyt AITA for not attending Bio daughters wedding because Her step sister was not invited. But everything you have contributed for the wedding alone is BEYOND generous. I have been engaged for almost six months and the wedding is happening in eight so this was the moment to start the selection of the Bridesmaid Dresses. The biggest caveat is that they must be married in Jon's family's church, full mass with communion. • 8 mo. AITA for not paying for my mom to be at my wedding? Not the A-hole. Reply reply. I can't even imagine paying 40k for a wedding! I'd rather use 200K on a home. Feb 29, 2024 · AITA For The Reason Why My Husband Want To Have A … AITA For Not Allowing My Daughter To Alter My Wedd… AITAH Because I 25f Want To Leave My Boyfriend; AITA Because I Didn’t Let My Son Stay Home T… AITA For Refusing To Share Money I Will Be Given H… Whenever someone accuses you of not paying, ask them how much they have contributed to the wedding. That's when I saw it. When she and my brother got married, it was a private ceremony with 17 people including the officiant as guests. My 19 y/o daughter asked me if her boyfriend (of 15 months) could come with us on vacation. If you want to see the previous post here it is. Cutting a cake is not a wedding. In my case, the situation revolved around my oldest daughter’s wedding dress. That’s the very least they can do. xp ce ki nh do az lh be ei vh
Aita for not paying for my daughters wedding dress. Check out this great listen on Audible.